Another School Year Begins Without Him – But His Pride Carries Me

The start of a new school year always brings a mix of nerves and excitement. Fresh supplies, new students, fresh goals — and for many, a chance to start again.

But for those of us walking through grief and loss, the rhythm of life feels different. The calendar flips forward, but our hearts still ache. This is the fourth school year I’m beginning without him, and yet, in so many ways, he’s still with me.

 The Ache That Doesn’t Fade

It’s strange how even after years, coping with grief doesn’t always get easier. It just changes.

Every August, I feel it. The empty space beside me where he’d cheer me on. The absence of his proud smile when I’d tell him about big milestones in my career or just the normal hum of the day.

He loved what I did. He believed in what I did. And every step I take in education feels connected to the encouragement he gave me. That love doesn’t disappear with death,  but grief reminds me how much it’s missed.

Faith and Grief Walk Hand in Hand

Through the darkest moments of loss, I’ve found comfort in Christian grief counseling and the promises of Scripture.

“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” – Psalm 34:18

I’ve come to realize that God does not remove our sorrow, but He walks through it with us. He doesn’t ask us to grieve alone. My faith has held me on days when nothing else could.

Grief support from faith-filled communities has reminded me I’m not alone, not in my sadness, my struggle, or my strength.

 What Helps Me Start the Year Anyway

If you’re beginning another year — whether it’s school, work, or a season of life — without someone you love, here’s what’s helped me:

• Invite them in. I carry a photo of him as the saved screen on my phone and of us on the lock screen.   He’s still part of my day.
• Feel all of it. I’ve stopped pretending I’m okay when I’m not. Grief support means allowing space for both tears and triumphs.
• Talk about them. I honor his memory with my students sometimes. His legacy continues in the care I give.
• Lean into faith. Christian grief counseling and prayer have helped me find peace when my heart was most broken.

Starting this year without him doesn’t mean I’ve forgotten him; it means I’m choosing to carry his memory forward.

To the One Missing Someone Right Now…

Maybe you’re walking your own grief journey, navigating grief and loss support resources, trying to find meaning in the new normal. Please know: you’re not alone.

Grief isn’t a straight line. It’s a circle, a wave, a spiral. It doesn’t go away, but neither does love.

As I walk into this fourth school year without him, I do so with tears in my eyes and strength in my steps. Because he was proud of me. Because I’m proud of him. Because this is how I honor us both.

And because even in grief, especially in grief, God is still good.

If you’re starting something new without someone you love, I see you. I stand with you. And I pray you feel held, by memory and by grace.