Profoundly Changed

A Love Story That Continues…

Our story began on June 15, 1982, with a blind date. Four days later, Bob proposed. Neither of us could have imagined the life we would build together, the family we would raise, or the love that would carry us through 37 years of marriage.

On October 20, 2020, my life was profoundly changed when Bob went to Heaven. The man who had been my husband, best friend, and partner through life’s joys and challenges was no longer beside me.

But our love story didn’t end that day.

I had spent years teaching and studying grief as a counselor educator. Yet experiencing the loss of Bob taught me that understanding grief professionally and living with it personally are two very different things.

Losing Bob didn’t erase what I knew professionally, but it gave that knowledge a deeply personal dimension. I came to understand that grief isn’t something we simply complete or leave behind. It becomes part of our lives, even as those lives continue to grow.

Profoundly Changed grew from that experience. It is a place where I share our story, reflect on life with grief, and offer the knowledge and understanding I’ve gained through both my professional work and my personal journey.

I believe grief doesn’t necessarily grow smaller. Instead, we gradually learn to grow our world around it, making room for the love we continue to carry and the life still unfolding before us.

I’m learning to move forward with Bob—not beyond him, but with his love remaining part of everything I do.

I have learned that we can’t truly understand one’s experience until we have walked the journey. This is my attempt to heal through helping others.

Read Our Story

My Mother’s Words

There was a time after Bob died when I struggled with the realization that I wasn’t the same person I had been before losing him. I wanted to feel like myself again, but the person I had been was inseparable from the life we had shared.

During one particularly difficult conversation, I told my mother how much it troubled me that I wasn’t “me” anymore.

My mother, a woman of deep faith and remarkable wisdom, helped me understand something I hadn’t yet been able to accept.

She reminded me that there are moments in life that change us forever. Then she said, “You will never be the same. Your life was profoundly changed when he died.”

Those words became the inspiration for Profoundly Changed.

My mother wasn’t telling me that I couldn’t experience happiness again or that my life had lost its purpose. She was helping me recognize that I didn’t have to become the person I had been before. I could continue growing into the person I was becoming, carrying my love for Bob with me.

Since then, my mother has joined Bob in Heaven. Her words have become even more precious, reminding me that the people we love continue to shape our lives long after they are no longer physically beside us.

Profoundly Changed is both a recognition of what loss changes and a reflection of the love that remains.

Living Forward with Love

Grief changes the landscape of our lives. The world continues moving, even when we wish it would stand still, and we find ourselves learning how to live in a world that no longer looks or feels the same.

I’ve come to believe that moving forward doesn’t mean leaving the people we love behind. Their love, their influence, and the memories we carry remain part of who we are and who we are becoming.

Through Profoundly Changed, I share reflections from my own journey, insights from my years as a counselor educator, and resources that may help others navigate life after loss.

There is no timetable for grief, no single path through it, and no expectation that we must return to who we were before. Instead, we gradually learn to make room for both the grief we carry and the life still unfolding before us.

We move forward with love.